A Different Dad

*The names in this story have been changed for anonymity.

When I was a child, I wished my dad would be more like other dads. Like the other dads in a club that we attended - the YMCA’s Indian Princesses. It was a club for fathers and daughters to participate in outdoor activities and learn about American Indian culture. (It probably won’t surprise you to find out that the club has since been disbanded after facing a slew of legal challenges from real Indian tribes).

My dad wasn’t mean. But he had a grumpy demeanor. We didn’t converse much. But when we did, it was usually him pontificating about a topic of his choice during a car ride, while I sat in the passenger seat daydreaming and gazing out the window. Also, he had a tendency to snap at me when I made errors, like dropping something or tripping, regardless of how unintentional they were.

The other dads in the club were more jovial. In particular, my friend Lydia’s dad, Stewart, stood in stark contrast to my father. Like my dad, Stewart was a lawyer. But unlike my dad he was warm and approachable. I never saw him lose his temper. He expressed personal interest in the other members and remembered details. He cracked jokes that appealed to both daughters and dads. Lydia and he were not just family, but friends.

I secretly wished I had a dad like Stewart.

I lost contact with Lydia and Stewart when my family moved out of state. Over the years, they faded from my thoughts.

I was getting home from high school when my mother called me over to the television.

“Look!” she exclaimed with a face filled with a mixture of horror and delight.

The news was on the TV and a familiar face was on the screen. Stewart! I listened eagerly.

“The law firm of Roth, Rosen and Allen is under federal investigation for running a Ponzi scheme out of the firm’s Las Olas offices.”

Basically, it appeared that Stewart and the other partners had found investors to front money, which they were told was being used to buy settlements from plaintiffs. The money would go to plaintiffs, who preferred a quick lump sum (even if it was less than the settlement amount). And when settlement payments came in over time, they would be distributed to the investors. But in reality, no such settlements existed and the partners were using money from new investors to pay off old investors.

Stewart, in particular, was accused of making illegal political campaign contributions, participating in bank fraud and using off-duty police officers to threaten a prostitute and her boyfriend who were threatening to expose Stewart’s involvement with her.

Eventually, Stewart plead guilty to criminal conspiracy. He was sentenced to 33 months in prison.

Reflecting upon the other fathers in the club, I realized that I didn’t really know any of them. I only saw one side of them - the side they chose to show when they attended monthly club meetings.

And I felt I had judged my father unfairly. I was privy to both his moments of good nature and his sour moods. It wasn’t possible for me to really compare him to fathers with whom I had limited, partial contact.

I felt somewhat fortunate. Afterall, my father may have been a grouch. But at least he wasn’t a fraudster.

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